Emotional Quotient: Do We Hear With Our Emotions?

Do people hear what they want to hear or do they hear what they feel?  The more I dig into the topic of emotional quotient the more fascinating it gets. As I observe my own responses and reactions I can't help but conclude that we interpret what we hear based on our internal wiring consciously or unconsciously.

Here is an example of hearing how we feel at work. Jack is not feeling particularly good about where he's at in life.  He lives at home with his mother and even though he has a great career and his mother thinks very highly of him, Jack reacts negatively to even a small reminder like , "Jack, your cab is waiting", with "you don't have to tell me, I know, I'm not a child".  A simple "thanks for the reminder" or just "thanks" would have been appropriate.  In Don Miguel Ruiz's  book, The Four Agreements, the second agreement is "do not take anything personally" but unless we are emotionally whole we do take everything personally. That's why when someone say some things or asks certain questions we automatically launch into a tirade or get in a defensive mode even  before the person is done talking.

To be a good leader we need to be a good listener first.  To be a good listener who responds rather than reacts we need to be emotionally whole, healed of the "sores" and "parasites" as +Don Miguel Ruiz so wonderfully illustrates in another of his books The Mastery Of Love. As everybody's friend +John C. Maxwell say, leaders develop daily not in a day.

The day to start is today, to be aware is priceless. 

 BEVERLEY ALLEN, FLMI

Beverley

Investment Fund Advisor & Life and Health Insurance Advisor
Desjardins Financial Security Investments Inc.
Desjardins Financial Security Independent Network
Ontario Central Region (OCR), GTA West Branch
5070 Dixie Road
Mississauga, On L4W 1C9

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